TOTEM

so i received my message from the ladypig at 6am............i just now realized that epiphany is january 6.....6 confirms that this is indeed my epiphany........digger pig's birthday is january 6, 2006 - that means 1 + 6 + 2 + 6 = 15 = 1 + 5 = 6 ; the messengers come to me as ducks and pigs ; and digger pig is my pig pig....my ephiphany pig.... ; in jr. high school print shop class i made hundreds of notepads that displayed, in the bottom corner, a small drawing i made of a pig next to some mushrooms and flowers. i used those notepads for years ; "Save the Pigs" was my rally and i didnt eat any form of pork again until my 20's. ; the date is 1 + 9 + 2 + 1 = 13 = 1 + 3 = 4...as long as i can rember, i have been obsessed by the numbers 2 and 4 - then the 3's and the 13's later in my 20's....my long time key has a number 4...does the 4 signify that i will understand all this on a 4 day like today?....the key is me and the lock and keys are the family......im looking at my necklace that has the 4 key - on one side it has a 4 and a D.....on the other side it has a 4 and a J. Dennis James - - on the same necklace is a silver moon and star pendant with an amyethist crystal attached...which brings to my attention the color purple - the cop that came to help me at the hospital was wearing purple latex gloves, purple duck tape...ive been noticing the color purple a lot lately - particularly noticing that it is paired with colors that particularly clash.....the moon has a very clearly defined and odd looking left eye....i take it that's a confirmation of ojosdelaluna. why i would choose to keep the key and the moon pendant together i do not know but i put them together in Texas before we moved and i take them out today and notice that the two items clearly represent Dennis and i...i believe....and that i purposely and unknowingly attached these items to eachother so far in advance...to take them out now and see for yourself that time really doesnt exist - i hate hate it but somehow the movie "the lakehouse" is involved and a missed sex - sandra bullock - (im still working on this). im exhausted....i havnt slept....im dizzy and have a sucking feeling in my brain....i'm so happy right now.